So Mike and I have been having a "playful" discussion on a few matters of household affairs lately. I'd love to get your opinion on a few matters because I know when I should apologize or lower my standards but before I do I just wanted to get my feelers out there and see what the norm is in homes all across the board!
So here's the first question: How often does your husband thank you for making dinner?
-every night, a few nights a week, only when it's a killer meal, not very often?
This first question stems from me WANTING to be thanked after every meal. I feel it's common curtisy to thanks anyone who cooks you something! I told him one night that he had failed to say thank you two nights in a row and it started a dialog of sorts...don't worry! He's already pulled the guys at the office so I don't feel bad asking my gals at my "office!"
Maybe I'm completely off base and my expectations are so out of whack ...if they are then by all means I need to just get over it! I guess this is all rooted in my desire to be an amazing cook. I would rather get a compliment on my cooking then a compliment on any other thing...above my home, my creativity or my talents. I really try hard to meal plan and execute a meal. It's harder then it looks and maybe my standards were set low... I grew up on top ramon, hamburger helper and mac and cheese. Taco night was an exception. You'd never call any meal in my home gourmet so maybe what I think is impressive is really just run of the mill but I work hard to try new things, make home made sides and put forth more of an effort then warming up a frozen dish. I'm no pro but no one could ever say I don't try and succeed most of the time!
Isn't it worth the three easy words to say..."Thanks for dinner!"
Second question: Who plans Anniversaries in your relationship? do you both just plan something, do you alternate? Are surprise involved? Do each of you expect the other to do something?
Anniversaries are the main way my husband likes to celebrate our love but we have never done anything over the top or super get a way like!!! I can't remember ever being disappointed but I would love to spice it up a bit! I just wonder how you guys celebrate!
ok that's about it on teh questions!
here's the happenings... Blue has a UTI!! no more bubble baths for her!She is so my daughter, poor thing, we have sensitive " area's" apparently! I too have been cursed agian!!!While at the doctors I thought for sure I'd have trouble getting her to pee in a cup... surprise surprise it only took a tiny bribe and doing it first myself to get her to pee in that funny little kid "hat" bowl thingy that collects her urine!!! The funniest part was her running back into the waiting room yelling " I peed in a cup Macy!!!I peed in a cup like mommy!!!" classic!The room was instantly entertained by her enthusiasm! She's been a real trooper!I know she's been in a lot of pain and I swear she went to bathroom 15 times today!
So David A. lost!!! I was a little sad for the poor kid but it's all a blessing right! I often wonder what sort of contracts and agree with Idol those winners have to agree on. We've all seen the success of past "losers!!" He'll be so successful . Now maybe there won't be such pressure for him when Mission time rolls around!
ok ladies... take it easy this glorious weekend!!! I just wanted to take a moment to honor all the fallen heroes who have served our country over the years! I have been blessed by brave men and woman who have served to keep my country free. I am proud to have service men in my family! I have a cousin who had fought in this current war, grandparents who served in WWII. I am proud to be apart of a country who fights for freedom. Thanks you to all who have died for such a cause! Happy Memorial DayEveryone!
20 comments:
OK !!! yes Ryan does thank me for making dinner every-night......... And he sometime will do the dishes as-well.... It makes me feel so good, when Ryan comes up to me and says, "Thanks Donna for making that great dinner. I love you "
We both plan our Anniversaries..
So sorry about sweet BLUE!!!!! I hope she feels better soon...
too much to comment on, i need to call you.
1. rob is good about thanking me, pretty much each night, and he does dishes too, which is a great help.
2. we alternate planning anniversaries- he gets odd years, i get even. we used to try to get away for the night, even if it was just the hotel down the street, but since we moved to AZ, we have made it a tradition to go get a couples massage. it takes a lot of the guesswork out of everything, and it is something we both love. it is also harder to get away with more kids, even just to the hotel down the street. i would have to take ryan since he is nursing, and that wouldnt be any fun! with that said, we are planning a get away weekend for just the 2 of us because we do feel like it is important for us to have our "alone time" without any kids. too bad this get away cant take place any sooner- maybe i will wean ryan earlier for selfish reasons! :) I need a vacation!
3. poor blue! and poor you too! knock on wood i havent had a UTI that needed medical attention for years! (i sometimes feel like I am getting one for a day or so, but then it goes away!)
emjoy your weekend! Any plans?
All right, so I know this probably isn't the 'normal' for everyone, but Josh not only thanks me every night I cook something, but he does it about 10 times. He thanks me before we start, after he takes his first bite, says how good it is throughout the meal, and then thanks me about twice after it's done. So yeah, I really don't think it's asking too much that you want to be thanked every night. You deserve that! Especially after planning and making a meal. It takes a LOT of work!
Second, with the anniversaries, we usually talk about what we would like to do and where we would like to go, and then Josh usually throws in a few suprises for me. Since we don't have grandma around to watch our kids this weekend, we will be having our anniversary 'trip' in about a month. We usually do try to get away somewhere though, even if it's just a few hours away. All of the reservation stuff usually falls on me, but Josh is always throwing in suprises for me. Like yesterday (since it was our anniversary) he came home at lunch and suprised me by telling me he had taken the rest of the day off. He then took me out to lunch at our fav. restaurant here in town, but he had called and made a reservation for us to be seated in their back room all alone! It was amazing and romantic to be able to share a quiet lunch with my sweet husband! Then he planned a few other suprises for me. Anyway, so that is how we do it around here! Sorry for the book, but I could go on all day about my amazing, wonderful husband.
I'm sorry about Blue and you too! I've never had one of those monsters, but I don't think I could survive without a bubble bath! Get better soon!
Poor Blue... :( Those are awful. Tyler is good at thanking me and usually does the dishes (we have a deal: I cook, he cleans up usually). Hey, the fact that you make an effort to cook those good meals (not to mention menu planning & grocery shopping) deserves a big thanks in my opinion! ;)
Bruce does a pretty good job at saying thank you. Sometimes he has so much on his plate (HA, not food) that I think he kind of forgets to say thank you sometimes. I guess I should do a better job at telling him thank you for getting up and going to work everyday!
We don't do a very good job at planning anniversaries. Something we will have to go all out on once our kids are older. I know we are kind of boring. We will live it up one of these days! :)
I don't do the cooking, my husband does, and I thank him after every meal he cooks. I realize that I am very lucky (and spoiled) to have a husband that does all the cooking so I let him know how grateful I am. Trust me, we'd die of either starvation or food poisoning if I did the cooking!
We've only celebrated 2 years of marriage (3 years this July!) and we have gone away for a few days for both and are planning a get away this year too. We realize that this might not happen once we have kids. He planned the first one, I planned the 2nd and I'm planning the 3rd! Surprises are rare. Hope this helps you!
Love you Becca, but TMI on the UTI!! Haha.
Sorry about Blue..poor little thing. UTI's are the worst!
Jeremy doesn't per say thank me in a full sentence every single night for dinner but he does the dishes for me every single night - I seriously can't remember the last time I washed a pan...
For the last 4 years I have planned the anniversaries and I'm SICK of it! I want to do the alternate years thing but it's always so much better when I plan it! Lol! It's been a bit of a discussion around here as well...
Good luck!
Tell him to kiss my butt, he should be thanking you everyday. It's not hard to say two words.
Preston says thank you pretty much every time. and he also does the dishes. In fact i can't remember the last time he din't thank me.
We usually plan together for our anniversaries. but the last we have gotten the shaft. Last year he had knee surgery and this year I was 10 months pregnant. I'm hoping to be able to GO somewhere next year.
sorry about blue and you. UTI's are the pits!
Hey! Well, when I cook dinner...Brent definitely thanks me after every meal. He sometimes thanks me more than once. Lucky for me...he loves to cook therefore when he is home I don't usually cook!!!
To answer the anniversary question...well I suck at planning things for a surprise. Most of the time he likes to plan it because he is so good at it. We either discuss it and then he plans it or it is a surprise.
Now that I am writing this...it really reminds me what a wonderful hubby I have. Thanks Becca ;) Love u sweets!
Well la de da de dooo to all of you with husbands who thank you a gazillion times after a nice meal. . . not to mention DO THE DISHES!
So Jason does sometimes and sometimes not so much. I do the same thing you do--I meal plan for the week (within a budget, which is tough enough), try new things, and cook pretty darn decent meals. I think you are right in that I don't think he realizes how much time and effort and love goes into the meal.
I have to remind Jason often that I would appreciate a "thank you." I don't think he means to be rude (that doesn't mean he can't change though!) So I'm with you on that one!
For anniversaries. . . I usually have to drop hints months ahead of time. We (or should I say I) mentioned that we should alternate the planning each year, but we usually plan it together (mostly me). Nothing ever fancy--that will have to come later in life for us--but always something fun (San Diego, Disneyland etc).
Well, since Aaron is hardly ever home for dinner he does say thanks whenever he does have a home cooked meal, but he NEVER does the dishes...EVER! Even if I'm on my deathbed, he'll clean the whole house, but let all the dishes pile up.
Anniversaries we've gone away a couple times, but not every time.
Sorry about Blue's curse, she should have to be dealing with that already.
Oh sheesh. After reading how most everyone else's hubbies say thank you after every meal, I'm super jealous. But really, it hasn't ever bothered me not getting a thank you and i didn't think about it until you asked. I don't tell him everyday after work how thankful i am for him working so hard so i can stay home and make him dinner so I guess that cancels out the requirement for him telling me thanks. If he finishes his plate of food and goes for 2nds and 3rds I just take that as an unspoken compliment...I guess i'll admit that I do watch carefully whether or not he finishes that plate!
As for anniversaries...HA! Jake plan one? please! That would be the day. Then again, I don't plan much either. Is it bad that usually we forget and miss our anniversary? I guess we just go out on dates a lot (helps having family nearby to babysit) and we do at least one big trip a year and even though it's not at our anniversary time, it's still us having a good time together and being in love. And that's fine with me.
First, those ribbon holders are amazing and I think I'm going to be needing about 15 at this point!
Now to answer your questions:
1. Just a few times a week, sometimes I have to say "wow, thank's Megan, that was a great dinner" and then he'll say it. I am with you on wanting to be a good cook, Jason claims he isn't picky, but he never REALLY likes anything, he just doesn't really HATE anything either.
2. Our anniversaries are so low key, (k, I guess we've only had 2, he he) but we have tried to go somewhere both times, no presents or anything though, and we both kinda plan it.
Sorry about Molly, that's so sad, those kill and she's so little!
Okay Becca were those first responses rigged or what? I read this outloud to my husband who just happened to be in the room and it was pretty funny how worked up he got...I think he felt like he was losing points big time, but he is good about helping me out especially when I ask. He was telling me the other day that he wants to take some cooking classes...maybe that is my cue! apparently everyone thinks I starve my husband so if he did the cooking I think it could be a win win!
Anniversaries...are my holiday. He is good about surprises. I am the one that needs to be romanced and so he takes over.
I love surveys! So here goes:
1. Joe always thanks me for a meal. Like you, I try real hard to make nice meals, and it's something I take pride in. He does always thank me at least once, but usually more. I watched a friend before I had children and how things worked in her house. After dinner, she did the dishes all by herself, with no children underfoot while her husband bathed the children or played with them. It was a time for her to have a little quite and she never minded doing the dishes. I thought it was a great way for things to work. Joe usually takes the girls so I can have a little time for quite. I don't mind doing the dishes after dinner...as long as it's quite. Sometimes he does take over and that's a nice treat too.
2. Anniversaries? What's that? OUrs happens to fall on Dec. 23, so no big outings for us. We usually just treat ourselves to early christmas presents!
Hope you have a good holiday.
1. Jason thanks me for every meal and he usually does the dishes unless he has school.
2. Jason is usually the planner of anniversaries. Sometimes I give input, but he usually wants to surprise me.
Poor Blue!
Steve usually always thanks me for dinner. He may not like it, but does say thank you. I am not the best cook, but sure am trying. :) Now if I could get the guy to do dishes! That never happens.
Anniversaries need to be planned better. We always do something special, but nothing major. We have talked about going to Hawaii. I would LOVE it!
I hope you, and Blue get to feeling better. Happy Memorial Day! We have stayed home all day, and it has been heaven!
Trent is on and off. Sometimes he will be over the top with thank yous and then other times, I could tell him to say thank you and it wouldn't phase him to.
And then about the anniversaries...Trent is the exact same way. I feel like if we ever want to do something totally over the top...it will be me planning it!
Well after reading the other comments - I am feeling a little cheated!j/k
My husband doesn't always thank me, and I have to admit, sometimes I feel bad and other times I give it no thought. Of course those times I care, are the times I went to more work - but I've learned that he really doesn't know - he doesn't see that I went to extra work. I hate to have to tell him though. I want to know how those other girls get their hubbies to do dishes?! Every once in a blue moon he will do them. I always feel guilty asking him to help because he's been to work all day. Hmmm...this is making me think!
Anniv. are a mutual planning thing most of the time - every once in awhile he'll get his mom lined up for babysitting. But nothing too fancy. I hoping that will come after the kids are grown!
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