Ode to Mr. Rubber Band

The sun rises once again and there I lie in bed snug and warm ready to greet a new day!!! I awake with much optimism ! I tell myself that "Yes!" today my pants will fit yet again one last time and to my surprise they do. A snug fit I will admit but looking close you all would notice that success was had in the form of a button wedged in tight to it's sister button hole! Hallelujah! Praises Be!

I proceed with my morning routine of kids, emails and a glance in the kitchen for something to eat. Nothing sounds good once again! But little sister inside is in need of that little thing we call nutrients to grow and thrive and I give in to the nagging mothering instinct that forces one to eat when that's the last thing they really want to do.

By 10 am I'm feeling the strain. Not on my legs or on my back but on my waist line! That little breakfast has quickly moved in on baby territory and it's roommate status is causing the land lord to walk funny! My morning success is soon down the drain and the reserve rubber band I place on my wrist is put to work! From then on I'm forced to pull and adjust my britches all day. My zipper never stays up and I just plane hate pants in general! Come on Mr. Rubber Band! DO your job! Keep me out of maternity pants for as long as you can! I beg of you PLEASE!!!!

Mr. Rubber Band and some pants get along better then most but today I picked an arch enemy! Would it be ok to add yet another rubber band making a chain of sorts! Maybe two is better then one!

Oh rats! I just need to give in. Horribly ugly! Never fit right! Nasty kangaroo pouch pants are just around the corner! Maternity pants have to be the worst thing on earth right now in my little world. I have yet to find a pair that doesn't look like the are about to fall off and expose my ever widening rear end! I tug and pull for the last 4 months and maybe at about a week before the arrival I can "fit" a pair properly.

So thanks Mr. Rubber Band for the limit service rendered. I wish you could have stayed longer!


Here is the much awaited preggo shot. I just look fat in the barral and if you were to rub my "baby bump" you'd probably just be carressing the blue berry bagle and cream cheese I ate this morning! I'll be pop popping soon don't worry!
and oh... can I just be annoyed right now!!!! Have you ever sat by someone telling a story to someone else that was soooooo wrong! ( Don't forget I'm overly annoyed while pregnant so it took all I had to not turn around, correct this lady and finish chewing!)

She was telling her friend that she had to read the book "Tuesdays with Morrie." She goes on to tell her that it's about this guy who has cancer who is a professor and had this famous "Last Lecture!" She then goes on to tell details of the lecture and says he really wrote it for his kids becasue they were to young to understand!

Come on moron!!! Stop mixing up two different things! She apparently Tivoed two seperate Oprahs years apart from each other and watched them back in her sleep and morphed the book and this gentalmans experiance together!

I wanted to correct her so badly but who wants a cross pregnat woman with cream cheese "smear" on the corner of her mouth telling you your an idiot! ( for real Enstine Bagel !Do we really need to call it a "SMEAR!")

Anyway! I'm aweful! I know!